On the right foot ...

I've had some trouble uploading images, so here I am finally putting up this Christmas photo. My mother had the right idea ... make sure the boy's a Steelers fan from as young an age as possible. That won't be easy here in Eagle country. If he turns out to be an Eagles fan, I can live with that. (Heck, if he turns out not to like football, I'll still survive). But early on, I'm planning on aiming him toward the Steelers.

On other issues: Someone commented on my previous blog entry, saying it is indeed true that babies don't blink for the first three months or so. What? Why am I only hearing about this now? That's the kind of knowledge parents need, I think. I would absolutely be freaked out by that if I didn't know ahead of time.

Other other issues: I'm amazed that Amanda can sleep through the baby moving and kicking. This morning, I felt the baby moving around while Amanda was still happily sleeping away. No way I could do that.

Holiday weekend

So, Amanda and I had some family over for Christmas. It was a very nice (if incredibly hectic) time. As expected, many spent much of the time trying to guess what we were going to name the baby. Again, nobody guessed the actual name -- which is a fairly common one. This still makes for great entertainment for us. We were worried we'd let the name slip, as we regularly use it when talking to eachother. The closest slip came a few weeks back when we were buying our Christmas tree. I said about half the name in front of my sister-in-law, but just sorta stopped, making it seem like I was mumbling something or other. Amanda said she came close to saying it over the weekend, but she avoided it as well.

One family member noted that if the baby was early, he would be a Capricorn, like he was. We noted that would be more than a week early, so we'd prefer if he wasn't. We asked what comes after Capricorn, and they pushed the question over to one of Amanda's aunts. She thought for a second, saying "Oh, it's the yappy ones" as she made a talking motion with her hands: "Aquarius!"
Oh joy, our baby is already being stereotyped as a "yappy one" before he's even born.

At another time, my mother (mother of six) noted that babies don't blink. I'll have to assume she means they don't appear to blink. Still, that's a bit creepy. Do we have to teach him to blink? Should I poke him in the eyes once in a while to encourage this important behavior? Eh, probably not.

Happy holidays, all

I imagine there won't be many people reading around these times ... everyone's too busy with their own families to read about Amanda and I adding to our family.

But for anyone who is reading, just wanted to say Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy New Year, etc.

For us, the adventure is just beginning. This is our last Christmas without a child ... it's going to be very different this time next year, I thing.

We're about five weeks away now ...

Pregnancy = 9-month sickness?

So Amanda feels like garbage today. We're fairly certain she got sick from me (I was sick over the weekend). Thing is ... it's tough to sort out the symptoms.

I had a sore throat; Amanda has a sore throat ... but it might be tied into the serious heartburn she's getting from the baby.
I was exhausted; Amanda was exhausted ... but being 8-months pregnant and having difficulty sleeping will do that do a person.
My joints hurt; Amanda's joints hurt ... but the baby is stretching in all kinds of directions, so that's not uncommon.

Usually, if one of us gets sick, the other follows suit. We're pretty sure she caught whatever I had. I'm wondering, though, whether we'd even be able to notice it as her being sick if I wasn't sick first.

Ah, pregnancy.

Baby energy?

During one of the baby classes we went to, the instructor said an early sign that the baby is near comes a good 10 weeks before the due date. According to the instructor, the sign is that the mother gets a big burst of energy she uses to "nest" ... get everything just perfect for when the baby arrives.
Where's my burst of energy? And is there a risk of baby "nesting" energy being "wasted" on preparing the house for family coming over for Christmas?

Amanda has had additional energy, but she's planning Christmas events and baking Christmas cookies galore. I'm not sure if I had any additional energy, but it was probably all used up to recover from feeling like garbage over the past weekend (half sick for the whole time).

With all this going on, who has time to remember there's a baby coming? (OK, that's very much a "dad's-eye view." I imagine Amanda can remember the baby is coming ... especially when he tests out his stiffening bones by kicking with more strength every day).

Baby brunch

We attended our second major "how to bring up a baby" class Saturday. There was a lot of worthwhile information ... tips on bathing the baby, how to deal with the cord stump, in-depth description of properly using your car seat. These classes have definitely been worth it, in case anyone is wondering whether they're really needed.
A friend asked if what we were being taught wasn't a lot of commone sense. He's right, but when it comes to bringing up a baby, it feels better to have a memory of a professional telling you you're doing it the right way somewhere in your head.

Play-Doh machine
Perhaps the oddest moment of the day came when the one nurse explained that, when changing the diaper and cleaning the baby off, you need to be careful of the Play-Doh effect. She explained that, when you lift up the baby's legs to get better access to cleaning off the backside, he'll act like a Play-Doh machine, and (she explained) shoot anything inside his bowels up to several feet away.
Oh joy!
I knew about the need for some urine shielding, but I wasn't aware of the Play-Doh concerns.
You know, the 1915 "Care and Feeding of Children" makes no mention of this. Maybe we're doing something wrong these days. Perhaps if I bathe the baby in 55 degree water, he'll be less likely to shoot things at me and the walls.

Random thoughts

Getting an Audi? Not quite
It appears Amanda is about to develop an "outtie" belly button. I can't help but think of the timer on a turkey ... she's done!

I'm the coach
Amanda's been telling me that I have to be prepared to be the coach once the delivery gets going. She figures she'll be stressed to the point that I'll be able to help out, calm her down, etc.
Personally, though, I can't wait to tell her to huddle up -- then I'll call a screen pass or, better yet, an end-around. The doctors and nurses will never expect a well-scripted trick play like that. We'll tear right through their pathetic defense and drive down the field. Touchdown!

Another class
We have a few more hours with an instructor Saturday, then that's it. We'll have a baby, they'll send him home with us, and we'll be parents. Don't we get training wheels or anything?

Could be better

I thought everything looked so great for our hospital and birth ... then Amanda told me about what a conversation she had with a friend at work.
Man, that's not fair.

During our baby class on Saturday, the instructor told us we'd get "room service" while Amanda stayed in the hospital for a little while, and she encourage the mothers to order food for the fathers as well. Great, I thought. I'll be exhausted; Amanda will be exhausted ... nothing helps deal with that better than someone else handling the cooking and dishes.
But Amanda's coworker told her about her experience: She and her husband got a steak and lobster "romantic dinner" in the hospital the day after the baby was born.

A steak and lobster dinner!?!? I don't care if it is "hospital food," that's still something.

Oh well, I guess I'll have to be content with having a newborn baby around.

The giggle loop

Amanda and I attended the full day (well, 6+ hour) baby class Saturday. It was extremely informative and useful. Everything from what kinds of warning signs to expect for labor to who will be around doing what before and immediately after birth to a tour of the hospital.

Then there were the breathing exercises.

This was only one day, so the teacher (who was really very good for the entire day -- Carol Reed at Virtua West Jersey - I highly recommend) was giving us the basics and urging us to continue to practice at home for the many hours of labor before we get to the hospital (yikes).

With the breathing, however, came the laughing. Amanda and I were supposed to be breathing in unison, as if I'm trying to help her focus while she's busy being in excruciating pain. But then we also were trying to time our breathing with the teacher ... and she was occasionally offering words of encouragement. So we'd breathe through the words, then she'd breathe on the offbeat, then Amanda and I would struggle to match everthing up again, ruining the whole exercise.

And all I could really think about during this was the British show "Coupling" and Jeff's description of the "giggle loop." He's talking about laughing at a funeral, but my thought was only that everyone was silent and serious, and here Amanda and I are giggle like kids. (EDIT: I'm removing some iffy language from the text below. Nobody complained, as far as I know, but I'm planning on showing this to our son once he's older, and I don't think I want to help add to usage of foul language. Here I am, becoming a dad right in public). Without further ado, from "Coupling," the giggle loop:

"You are surrounded by people for a moment of silence when the Giggle Loop begins ...

"Suddenly out of nowhere this thought comes into your head: the worst thing I could possibly do during a minute's silence is laugh. And as soon as you think that you almost do laugh -- automatic reaction. But you don't, you control yourself, you're fine. Whew."

"But then you think how terrible it would have been if you laughed out loud in the middle of a minute's silence. And so you nearly do again, only this time it's a bigger laugh. And then you think how awful this bigger laugh would have been. And so you nearly laugh again, only this time it's a very big laugh, it is an enormous laugh. Let (it) out, and you get whiplash. And suddenly you are in the middle of this completely silent room and your shoulders are going like you are drilling the road. And what do you think of this situation? Oh ... you think it's funny!"

The image on the screen during the description is of a pint glass stacked barely on top of another, and then another on top of that ... until they all come crashing to the floor. I kept picturing that during the class. Luckily, it appeared the people next to Amanda and I had the same problem, laughing quietly away.

Even through the laughing, though, we learned what we came to learn. This was a very useful class. And with the baby due in 49 days, we need all the help we can get.
Tonight: Another doctor appointment. Saturday: Another baby class.

Eat your eggs!

Oh, what the heck, The Care and Feeding of Children is such a treasure trove, you can pretty much open it to any page and find great wisdom.

To what extent may eggs be used in the diet of this period (4 to 10 years)?
They form a most valuable food. It is important that they should be fresh, and only slightly cooked ... fried eggs should not be given, and most omelets are objectionable. The finely grated yolk of a hard-boiled egg may be given with advantage to many infants even as young as five or six months.

similarly ...

What are te important points to be considered in giving meat to children?
Most meats should be rare.

...

Are not gravies beneficial and nutririous? The beef juice from a roast is exceedingly nutritious and desirable.

On vegetables: "The principal trouble in the digestion of vegetables is due to imperfect cooking. It is, in fact, almost impossible to cook them too much.

All that from three pages I randomly opened to. Good stuff. You read it folks, straight from a doctor: give your baby undercooked eggs and meat and cook those veggies until they're a tasteless mash. Yum.

So you know, the American Academy of Pediatrics says egg yolks are OK, but they're not as good a source of iron as previously believed -- iron-fortified cereals and such are better and safer (less Salmonella risk). As for meats, cook fully to kill bacteria is a good rule of thumb for those without fully developed immune systems.

OK -- it's 7:49 (despite whenever blogger.com says I'm posting this ... are they on Greenwich Mean Time or something?), so it's time to push off for the hospital soon.

Feedback III

It's 7:16 a.m., and I'm up and fully dressed on a Saturday morning, ready to go to my 8:30-3:30 one-day baby class. Why are things scheduled for 8:30 on a Saturday morning? Why not 9:30 to 4:30? Just a little extra sleep on our day off.
Oh well.

Since I have some time to kill, let's look at the old mailbag ...
To "Made the Crib," Michelle commented on the bored hours waiting for the baby to be born and the excitement of the baby. I can't say much about the baby yet, but the anxiety of waiting seems right on. We think we have everything ready, but we know there's stuff we've forgotten. I'm losing my mind, while Amanda is still in awe of the show the baby puts on when he starts to move incessantly for 20 minutes (OK, I'm in awe as well).
To the same post, a future "great aunt to be" asked if I made sure the crib was safe. Did I "test out" the crib? Sorry, I think my weight might be a little too much for the crib no matter how expertly I put it together. But it seems pretty sturdy ... and I only had a few leftover parts that didn't seem to belong anywhere.

To "Baby products," I got a couple responses from a family member and a coworker. I told Tammy at work that I knew I should have kept my mouth shut instead of mocking the $2,800 SIlver Cross stroller -- now we'll never get one. Regarding Dan, I have to wonder why my wife's teenage cousin is reading a baby blog. Whatever, the more the merrier.

"Baby inventory" got two more comments: Michelle suggested we skip the pain management class. I explained in a later one why we wanted to go. Looking back, Michelle was right -- it didn't tell us much we didn't know. Still, we were glad to have the opportunity to ask questions to someone in the field who deals strictly with these kinds of issues.
Then Dan commented on The Care and Feeding of Children book. It is good stuff. I'll share more of the excellent book in the future.

"Pain management"?

So we took our first class on how to have a baby last night. It wasn't quite as advertised.
We got ourselves together for the two-hour "Pain Management for Labor/Delivery" class. When the class ended and Amanda and I were driving home 45 minutes after it started, we agreed the class should have been called "Why You Should Have an Epidural."

Not that there's anything wrong with that. We were leaning in that direction anyway, and the class cleared up our concerns and gave us a better idea of what to expect and what we can ask for if minor problems crop up (if there's too much numbness, we can tell the anaestheologist and have it dealt with quickly; we shouldn't expect complete numbness unless something isn't going as expected; etc.)

But I still felt like something wasn't quite right. The schedulers/instructors in these classes probably do them on a regular basis, but those of us being taught (many first-timers) really don't know what we're getting in to. If a class is scheduled for two hours and lasts 40 minutes (including Q&A), people are going to wonder if they heard everything they were supposed to hear. I'm sure we did, but I know I wasn't the only one wondering why we were told two hours. Us first-timers tend to worry is all I'm saying.

All that being said, I though things went well. The instructor was fully able to answer all our questions. She clearly explained the procedures, giving a taste of the science involved (and more than a taste when someone asked precisely what drugs are involved). She provided statistics to back up what she was saying. And she offered some of her personal experiences.
The pictures of how the epidural is administered were enough to cause a little cringing, but it was best to get them out of the way now so Amanda and I know what to expect in seven weeks or so.

Now we have a little information. Hopefully that means we'll be ready for the seven-hour class coming up Saturday. Yikes!

Baby classes

We're off to our first baby class tomorrow night. Even though a reader suggested the pain management class wasn't really worth it, we're still going to give it a try. Because of the time of year, classes at our hospital are somewhat limited. That means we're taking a couple of full-day classes rather than spreading the classes out over a month or two.
That has us a little worried. I'd rather let things sink in, try to remember stuff from week to week, have someone to ask questions to. Because we're doing it condensed, I want to make sure we get to the hospital at least a few times to have someone around that can answer our questions.
Not that the doctor can't do that, but I like a few different points of view whenever possible.
Anyway: Pain management on Thursday; full-day baby class on Saturday and another lengthy one the following Saturday. Somehow, I have the feeling this is going to create even more stress for us.

In other news, I put together the Graco Travel Lite crib this week. We opted a little smaller than the highly regarded Pack 'n' Play. This thing was more confusing to put together than the full-size crib! There are at least four places on the thing where directions and warning are printed on the fabric or sewn into it. If that's not enough, one of those sets of directions also hides a secret pocket that has the real directions for putting it together. I figured I was doing fine without any "real" directions, but the bassinet feature clearly warns not to try putting it together without the written instructions. The last thing I was going to do was risk my unborn baby, so I was on the verge of giving up for the night when I located the secret pouch.
Then all I had to do was figure out what the directions meant. My favorite was two diagrams of the crib with "OR OU O" in between. Is there an "S," Pat? Maybe an "M"?
I'm thinking now it was showing two optional ways to finish putting it together (A 'or' B), and had "or" in a couple of languages. I was thrown off, however, because everything had been English up to then, and the two options were so similar, there was no reason to give you as much information as it gave.
So far, the Travel Lite has been my biggest headache. And, all things considered, that's not so bad.

It's all about the products

(Another two-post day ...)
I can absolutely see why the manufacturers of baby products make a killing. As the big day gets closer, every parent (and grandparent and aunt, uncle, cousin, friend, etc) sees so many "perfect" items that they just have to get. I'm not immune (like I said before, I'm the one who first bought baby clothes for the kiddo).
I stopped by the mall around lunch today, and I saw a mother carrying her baby in a Baby Bjorn carrier. And I immediately thought of how incredible it will be to tote around my own baby the same way. Here's a pic and a link: http://www.babybjorn.com/index.asp?language=US

Now I know this thing screams "yuppie," but that doesn't change a thing. I'm looking forward to carrying him around in the contraption. Heck, I've put the thing on a half-dozen times since we got it at the shower, and the due date is still almost 8 weeks away. But I've so far managed to keep myself from buying the Baby Bjorn drool bib to protect the carrier.

On the other hand, I have to revisit the WeeBlock Absorbent Urine Shield. Does anyone know anyone who has one of these? This one is the "Whiz Kid."

Then, of course, there's the following items I saw on another baby-related blog I was looking at today (www.daddytypes.com) ... it's birth jewelry at Midwifery Today (http://www.midwiferytoday.com/Merchant2/merchant.mv?Screen=CTGY&Store_Code=MT&Category_Code=JE). This is some weird stuff. Womb with a View pendant? Well, if this stuff sells, I think going with the safe and very functional Baby Bjorn is reasonable.

Baby inventory

We finally started trying to get an inventory of what we have and what we need over the weekend. I went through and opened all the packages of onesies and bibs and towels and socks and a good number of things that I just didn't know what they were (we decided the one that looked like a big pot holder for the baby was probably another burping cloth).
We were once again amazed about the size of things ... the four "newborn" size socks look like little finger puppets, but they wouldn't even fit to the bottoms of my fingers.

Then we started talking about what the baby will wear when we bring him home from the hospital. Amanda's mother knitted him a sweater that seems like a bet, but we'll need something very warm for the hospital-to-cold-car trip in late January.
It's hard to believe we're actually talking about what he'll be wearing in just a few more weeks. Pretty soon, we'll get into major "how to handle a baby" classes, as well. We're going to a pain management class this week, followed by a full-day baby class Saturday and another big one next Saturday. If I wasn't scared before ...

But then, whenever things seem overwhelming, I always enjoy a quick read of The Care and Feeding of Children. For those who haven't seen my earlier references to this book, I'm working with the 1915 edition of the classic. I figure that if babies were treated this way and survived back then, how bad could I do?

What can be done for older children who take cold upon the slightest provocation? They should be kept in cool room, especially when asleep. They should not wear such heavy clothing that they are in perspiration much of the time. Every morning the body, particularly the neck, chest, shoulders and back should be sponged with cold water (50 to 60 degrees F).

How should the cold sponge bath be given? The child should stand in a tub containing a little warm water, and a large bath sponge filled with cold water should be squeezed two or three times over chest and shoulders. For best effects, this sponge bath should be very cold and very short. It should be followed by a vigorous rubbing with a towel until the skin is quite red. This may be begun at three years, and often at two years. For infants, a little higher temperature (65 to 70 degrees) may be used.